Good couples relationships take work.
Consistent effort and energy.
When we keep up with the work it seems to take up less time and energy, wouldn’t you say?
When you brush your teeth consistently you’ll have better checkups at the dentist.
When you wait until ALL of the clothes are dirty, it takes the entire day to get the laundry done.
When you work on your relationship daily, you’ll reap the rewards of good seeds sowed.
How are you doing with that?
Many couples complain that the ‘fire’ is gone from their relationship.
And yet, when I ask what they are doing to keep the fires going I hear that there’s the kids, the job, the ‘this’ or the ‘that’.
So, how you ask, does this play to building or rekindling the fire? Well, I’ll tell you how I think of it.
When you consider building a fire, there’s some work to be done.
Scoping out a good spot, gathering the wood, the kindling, placing the wood ‘just so’ that it will catch and burn to it’s fullest.
But you don’t just stop there, do you?
Of course not.
Maybe it’s just me, but I LOVE to play with the fire. To push and prod the logs about. Allowing for more air to circulate and feed the flames. To sit and watch the intensity that builds.
And, after a while, to see the the flames are no longer as big and bold, but now merely kissing the wood. And at this point, if you were to poke at the wood, the bark might fall away and show you the intensity of the heat under the surface. The bright, hot burning embers from the inside of that log.
At this point, you could step away from the fire, or even go to sleep. Because from this point, you can re-KINDLE the fire the next day. At this point, you don’t have to start over and rebuild from the ground up.
What if we looked at our relationships just like this? What if we tended to our relationships each step of the way so as to not have to start over and rebuild? What if?
If you find yourself at a point of rebuilding your relationship, call me. I love helping couples rebuild the fires that brought them together.